The Inspiration and the Lesson.

      Ok, before you read this, I'm going to attempt to make you do some homework. In order for this post to be less confusing, I promise it will help if you read where my inspiration came from. I read this blog called Life To Her Years; Dad's tips for adding life to a daughters years. The specific post that I linked you to is titled,

50 Rules for Dads of Daughters. 

Go on! Read it! I can wait......

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Did you read it? 

Yes?

OK, lets continue.

      Now, reactions.... Well, there are an array of 1st responses. "Awww!! How Sweet!/Cute!" Maybe, it brought a few tears to your eyes with sweet, loving memories of you and your dad. 

      For me, things like this make me feel this deep yearning for love and acceptance suppressed by troubled heartache I've carried for a majority of my life. It would be like a backwards Pandora's box for me; I have the hope that conceals all the sadness and despair on top,  but, when I make myself vulnerable by moving that hope aside by reading something like this, thats when all the yearning, longing strings of my soul, tug and strum on my heart. It's very emotionally painful for me, and, right now as I type this, I feel a bit empty; like a part of me is missing. Sure, you can say it's not too late and I can still form a relationship with with my dad, which I already know and am working on, but, I can't make up for lost time. We can't change the past and you can't erase memories. The damage is done, the words have been said; all thats left to do is my best as a dysfunctional adult, and to try to apologize or learn to let go, and move on. We're human - change and letting go is, unfortunately, not an easy thing to do. 

      In my Philosophy class (which I love!) at school, I heard quite a few profound and deep statements during my professors lecture today. We were learning about Confucius and Buddha and their views on the fundamentals for a society to function. 

*side note* (pun intended) The main facts I find interesting are: these men lived at least 500 years before Christ and they found the same moral values that are imperative to becoming an ethical, decent, and well educated human being that we just toss aside and take for granted today. Huh.... this speaks volumes, I think. 

      Anyway, according to Confucius, men are born "to find trouble". So, to teach the "natural" man to be a good man, he needs to be taught ethics then math (education). This order lights the path to a good and educated business man. Ethics provides the way to goodness and truth. If you educate him before he learns ethics, his chances of using his education for evil sky rocket. Women, apparently, are born more naturally good, but are easily more vulnerable. Their foundation just needs to become solid.

      You've heard the saying, "Behind every good man is a good woman"? Well, here's the saying a bit re-vamped; behind a bad woman, is a bad man. (Keep in mind that these are not my words! This is all Confucius.) Bad women are corrupted by bad, vulgar men. This man can be the father, brother, boyfriend, husband, etc., he can be anyone to the woman. The woman can be easily swayed if her foundation is not solid because she is more vulnerable. When she becomes corrupt, she will stand beside a bad man. (or the chances of that being so is definitely escalated.)  

      This made me pause and think. I know I'm corrupt (to a point) but, I'm not sure who corrupted me. It could have been daddy - or lack of daddy, or my brother - or lack of brother, or it could have been all the guys I put in daddy's place, since he wasn't around as much in those "male influencing years", that were mostly all bad examples and influences. (Remember, you are always an example, but are you a good, or bad one? I know I'd rather not be used as a bad example, do you?)

      The major downfall of this country, especially in the last couple generations of child rearing, is we base our society on our emotions. If you like someone, they're invited to your inner circle, but, heaven forbid someone crosses you, you don't want to see them again. Could be a boss, a teacher, your best friend from kindergarten, your parent, your, sibling, your spouse. Who cares? This person has no right to be in your life because they did some wrong by you, right? WRONG! Because of this, this is why our families are failing, why marriages are failing, why the government is failing. Because everything is done out of emotion. If everything was done out of respect, our country and all the other groups in our country (i.e. the family unit) wouldn't be crumbling the way it is. 

So, I never planned on this post being so long. I was going to add my insights from Buddha, but, I think I'm going to save that for another post. Anyways, thanks for reading if you made it this far and I hope you found some insights yourself. :)