Marriage

You know, this whole weekend of the gay community being able to get married in Utah has got me thinking. We predominantly live in a society who thinks marriage is simply a piece of paper, where a couple would rather cohabitate than commit to each other. Divorce rates are dropping simply because less and less people are choosing to get married. As a result, families are either becoming nonexistent or they are being targeted and torn apart and leaving extreme emotional scars on the children of the future who are supposed to take care of us when my generation gets old.... how is this comforting? How can so many straight people want this life? I'm actually in awe of the LGTB community. All they've been able to do is cohabitate, and that hasn't been enough for them. They actually want to commit to each other, to be a family! How admirable is that!? I love that there are actually people out there who care about the commitment of marriage. Instead of being discriminating and hateful, I think we should marvel at the example this group of people are setting. The straight community could learn a lot from their mindset; we need to not take marriage for granted! It is a God given right and sacred bond that gets trashed and misused everyday. I'm grateful there are people still fighting for that desire that seemed to have become "unpopular". 

The Ashley you know and love, is back!

Sorry for the long hiatus everyone, but, it was necessary. Most of you know that my life started going down hill a year ago last December. 2013 has been anything but a kind year to me. Honestly, I'd say that I was seriously mentally unwell for about 9 months of this entire year. All my mental illnesses went from mild/moderate to severe, and I heavily considered suicide more times than I'd like to admit. I admitted myself to a psych ward for almost a week in the beginning of the year and that was a very.... educational and traumatizing experience. I left that place feeling terrified going back out into the world and with more prescriptions than I came in with. Through out the course of the year,  I learned I couldn't trust almost everyone I thought I was close to and I had to start again at ground 0 to build new friendships and relationships. I have been subject, over the course of my life to now, to every form of abuse. Basically ever since March, I've had extreme difficulty finding a descent a stable job. In July, I got diagnosed with Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome, commonly known as P.C.O.S Depending on the severity of the disease, it can render some women completely infertile, and I don't know how severe I am and probably won't know until I want to get pregnant, which is now years away for me.  As you can see, I've had a horrible year.  

As I've had many low points this past year, I've had some high points as well. I am now on only one medication and it has nothing to do with mental illness. I happened to be blessed with a descent job about a month ago, and I love it! I had the opportunity to go to school this semester and I have loved my class! (I'm actually really bummed that the semester is over.) I gratefully never became homeless and hungry because of my wonderful mom and sister being there for me, no matter what, as true family members should be. I also had the opportunity to make one of my dreams come true; I got to work at Nightmare on 13th (a local haunted, haunted house), and be part of the Nightmare crew, but we like to call each other family. :) **as a side note; to get hired at Nightmare,  it's a 4 step audition process, and this was the hardest new hire year they had because so many nightmare veterans returned. So the fact that I got a part there was nothing short of amazing!** Through out the year, I've had a few extremely kind and giving men, that were either complete strangers to me or distant acquaintances, just give me money, and we're not talking 20 dollar bills, either. I've had other kind people fill my gas tank, give me food for my animals when I ran out, and give me gift cards as well. I know I'm missing a few others simply because I'm choosing to not mention them because they are personal to me or they temporarily slipped my mind, but, you get the picture! I've been on the receiving end of great charity and service that I will not forget. Through out my humble circumstances, I feel incredibly blessed, loved, and fortunate in my life. There are some days I forget, but, I'm human; I'm definitely more grateful than not. I happened to also have the opportunity again to work with a man I truly love and admire: Marshall McDonald. If you don't know who he is, I'd suggest you Google and YouTube him right now! He is currently the choir director at the Taylorsville Institute at SLCC's Redwood Campus. He has a day (audition) choir and a night (anyone) choir. I got to be in the day choir for a 3rd time (I've been in this choir on and off for 5 ish years). I had had promptings all year long that I needed to 'seek healing through music', and choir was an answer to prayer. Not only did I have amazing experiences, like meeting/singing for General Authorities in person, I got to meet amazing people. People who I am proud to call my friends. This semester has quite literally changed my life! My circumstances are basically the same, but my outlook has changed because I allowed the Gospel and goodness back in my life. I've been called to seek forgiveness and as of right now, it is currently the biggest challenge I'm working through. If I can walk through hell and come out with no visible damage, and still be able to testify of the Truth and Beauty of the Gospel, then you can do it, too! Remember, Heavenly Father loves you.

A dream come true!

So, I'm still wondering if I'm dreaming, but, I know I'm not. I got a new job on Tuesday and I LOVE it!!! I'm finally working with dogs! It is so hard to get into the 'animal industry'. I now work at City Pet Club, or CPC for short. It's pretty much a day care for kids, but with dogs, who also sometimes spend the night, and there is also cats. There's lunch time, nap time, play time, the occasional fight you need to break up, it sounds just like kids, right? In this case, volunteering with NMHP was definitely worth it! Not that volunteering anywhere is ever not worth it, but, I can now get paid to do something I love.

"If the Devil is real, then God must be real, too."

Photo Credit

If you don't already know, I'm diagnosed with depression, anxiety, OCD, and I have a hormone imbalance. ALL these things mess with my emotions, hence why I feel like I am a 24/7 wreck. It doesn't help that I've been yo-yo dieting and have had so many prescriptions in the last 3 months that Dallin is going nuts. 

Pretty much since being told in December that I'm at high risk for

WE'RE MOVED!!!

It's SUCH a relief to be moved and in our own place! *sigh* (insert happy/relieved face right here.)

DRUMROLL

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Here's the moment you've been waiting for ..... PICTURES! 

The pictures uploaded WAY out of order, so, you can try tour best at figuring it all out ;)

Family room

Family room

Family room

Master

Master

Main bathroom

2nd bathroom

2nd bedroom - future childs room 

3rd 'bedroom'/office (which will actually be guest room/library/craft room)

Detached external garage and shed (SO much storage! I love it!)

Living room

Living room

Kitchen

Dining area

Family room

I love our house :) 

P.S. We added a new member to our family, too. I will eventually post pictures of him, too.

Stay tuned 

Blessings

Things over the past few weeks have been answers to prayers. My prayers have been more prayers in my heart; I'm making a goal to do better with personal prayers. So, I'm sure for those who have been praying for us - those have been answered as well. I've been meaning to blog for awhile, but I've been so busy. I guess everything starts back at the start of August, but, I think I'll hold your attention captive and save that for another time. 

The past few weeks, I can see the Lords hand has been involved in my life; I can only hope I can be humble and give the gratitude he deserves. My 2 vacations were much needed and memorable. My job has been a HUGE blessing! My mom moved back home, and I feel many things fell in place for our house. 

First off, I can't say how perfect my job is; it's everything I've wanted in a job and more.

Our house. *sigh* Can I tell you when my Realtor called and told us that we got the house - I can't believe I didn't cry! This-house-is-PERFECT! Yes, it's in Magna, but, it's the nicest neighborhood I've seen in Magna. It's the perfect size, a central location between both of our jobs, and everything I wanted in a house. My biggest 3 things was I wanted an open floor plan, a 2nd bathroom, and a fenced yard. The sellers also let us keep the fridge, stove, microwave, and dish washer - the ONLY thing we need to buy is a washer and dryer. The house is move in ready. I can't think of a better place to start our first ever home together. :) 

P.S. This wasn't as detailed as I wanted it to be because it is getting late and I am tired, so, hopefully I will add on later. :D goodnight. 

Mrs. Ashley Marie Ford

Surprised? Yes as you should be. You're probably wondering why I would post a blog about myself? That's a very good question which deserves a very legitimate answer. The truth is, this isn't your average-everyday blogger signing back on for another regular post. This is a blogger taking over who has never posted a blog before.... until now. Ashley has been out of town since August 3rd and won't get back for another few days. So, in the meantime, I plan to take over and steal all her fans away while she's gone! Mwahahaha!! Okay, just kidding, not really. I'm pretty sure most of you have either guessed correctly by now. If you are still wondering who this is and why they are stealing the blogging spotlight from the one and only, you'll find out soon enough. 

Well, your questions will be answered in due time, but for now all you need to know is this blog is about a special someone named

 Ashley Marie Ford.

She was born on July 7th 1988. She is the oldest of 10 siblings (a mix of kids in a blended family either by marriage, or birthed from other parents.) 

She was married on 09/09/09 to Dallin Ford.

Early Life & Persistence

She grew up in Sandy, UT. She has had a very hard life from the get go. She struggled with learning and school at an early age while her younger siblings excelled in school. Her mother thought she would be the only one to drop out of school because of these problems. She overcame her obstacles and was the only one that ended graduating high school (in 2007) while her siblings in actuality ended up dropping out of school. (One has diploma from 2nd attended high school) She had a hard family life having to experience heart ache and depression from family trauma and divorce growing up. But she's made it this far and continues to persist in even the roughest of times.

Animal Lover

Ever since Ashley was young, she has always loved animals. They have been apart of her life and still are to this day and always will be. Her favorite is dogs but she loves all animals in general. She has had multiple pets growing up and has lost many along the way. Her most current pet is her little doggy Gizmo that she loves more than ever.

Even while struggling financially she volunteered at No More Homeless Pets every week because of her passion for animals was so strong.

Music and Books

Ashley has an amazing voice, she is one of the only members in her family that is very talented and blessed with a beautiful singing voice. She has been in multiple choirs throughout her life. From high school choirs, to being a part of the renowned Salt Lake Symphonic Choir, to even auditioning for American Idol. Music has always played a huge role in her life. One of her favorite bands (just to name 1 of many) is Linkin Park. She loves Linkin Park!

She also loves reading, she has a wide selection of fantasy books that she has read over and over. She has always been a huge book worm and continues to read from time to time to this day. One of her favorite books (also just to name one of many) is Harry Potter. For those of you that don't already know, this is her current Facebook profile picture as we speak actually!

Gamer Girl

It's fun to have someone that you can play video games with. Especially when you hear that that someone is a girl. Ashley's always been into gaming unlike most girls you'll come across. Which I think is pretty awesome and it makes most people jealous. Her whole family has always been big gamers. Her and her mother used to have regular "Halo Party's"! Believe it or not her GRANDMA is the one that got her family into gaming in the first place. Halo and Left 4 Dead and Portal are some of Ashley's all time favorites.

Halo

Left 4 Dead

Portal

Honesty

Ever since I've known Ashley she has always been a 100% honest person. She's one of those people that literally can't lie. She sometimes gets her self into trouble because of her being so truthful on certain matters; but with that being said, that isn't exactly a bad thing. There are very few people left that I know of that are as honest as this girl, she has a Christ-like countenance about her that glows when it comes to honesty. That is just one of many Christ-like attributes that she possesses.

Unconditional Love & Obedience

Ashley has a big heart, a very BIG heart. When it comes to unconditional love she tops the cake. No matter who it is, where they came from, what they're story is she loves and continues to love after that. Whether it's people or animals it doesn't matter. She shows it with her family, she shows it with friends, and even people that she has just met. She looks past the judgmental side of things and demonstrates a great love for her fellowmen. Another Christ-like attribute that glimmers about her. Also another attribute that is very rare these days. Early in her life when growing up she has always struggled with church in her life. She was active for a while, then had a big gap of being less-active because of family matters and divorce being present as previously mentioned. She never had good examples in her life when it came to church activity. But that being said that didn't change her obedience within. She has a very obedient soul about her. She just struggled because there was no one to support her so she fell away for a time being. When I met her I could tell that there was a hunger for obedience, which is miraculous because when someone falls away for as long as she did it takes them just as long to come back to the path, but not her. She was able to almost instantaneously, and that is something I truly am grateful for because obedience is a hard thing to develop. She shined with obedience and was an example to her whole family by coming back and going through the temple, being sealed, and continuing to serve with dignity in all of her callings in the church to this very day without fail. Since then her father has been able to enter the temple again after falling away for a very long time. Her grandma (same mentioned above) has joined the church and was baptized, and also entered the temple about a month ago. And I believe it has all been because of her great obedient example that she continues show day to day.

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Well hopefully by now my blog writing skills have been up to par at this point, knowing that "most" of the readers that come here are going to be of the women audience. Hopefully I blended in well and the thought of  a male blogging didn't come as to big of a shock to your minds. But yes it's true, this is Dallin. (Ashley's husband) I'm grateful for this opportunity to tell you guys some basic facts about this wonderful woman, as it only seems fair since she filled you in about me in a previous blog, here. Who knows maybe I'll be back? 

Thank you wifey for all that you do.

"Doggy Pile"

Wow! It's been awhile since I blogged last. Life has been busy and chaotic in the past few weeks. Well, I can't remember what I've blogged about last, but, I'll "dog pile" everything for you guys:

Dallin has been working his butt off as usual, and I've been in school full time (my 1st and probably last time ever) the past semester. If you include my 2 institute classes I took, I did about 16 or 18 credit hours this semester, and I STILL am in Salt Lake Symphonic Choir AND I got a part time seasonal job about a month ago - yeah, I've been busy; and all that at once was probably a bad idea. Oh well. 1 concert and 2 finals down, have 2 concerts and 3 finals to go! 

On top of this, we had to do $1,300 of repairs between both our cars, back-to-back, and I was car-less for almost 2 weeks (NOT FUN!) and our hard drive in our computer went bad and that cost $400 to repair! The computer crashed RIGHT as I had a bunch of major papers due, and guess what? We lost everything on our computer; all documents, all my Photoshop stuff, any program we ever downloaded, all our pictures, wedding pics - EVERYTHING! When it rains - it pours. I'm just grateful we never got the car we were wanting to get so we had the money to pay for all these stupid repairs! If we didn't have the money - I don't know WHAT we would have done! 

The other thing that sucks is those repairs dipped into our funds for our down payment for a home, too - if anyone wants to "reimburse" us the $1,700 we lost, I'd gladly accept! (yes, I know - I'm dreaming. *sigh*) I wish we had a long-lost relative that left us money in a will and died or something..... we're just starting to get desperate to get out of here. In 2 days we will have officially lived with my in-laws for a year - yuck! I love [most] of them, but, I hate living with them. I just hope we can find a house sooner than later; house hunting is exhausting!

 My sister had her son, Aeros (I know), on Dec 23rd and he was pretty healthy for being really early. He was due on Feb 14th of this year! My sister-in-law had her baby on April 25th, his name is Gary, and she was 3 weeks late! My sister, Amber, is always early and Karen, my sis-in-law, is always late. So, now I have 4 nephews and 2 nieces - I LOVE being an aunt! 

On April 26th, my Dad turned 50. My step-mom threw a surprise party for him and it was AWESOME! My dad seemed so thrilled to have 50 + people to be there for him! I have some pictures that my aunt Jaimi took (http://www.yourlifeinfocus.net) that I will share. Hope everyone is having a good spring! 

The kids helping my dad blow the candles out.

Aeros

My dad, Amber, me, and Aeros. 

Me with the boy :D He looks just like Amber when she was a baby. 

AHH! Can I tell you how excited I am that this picture finally exists!?  This is the first picture that has all my family in it besides my mom (and step-dad [by default]), and 2 other sisters. So, here we have my Dad, Step-mom, Tammy, and 7 of my 9 siblings. (10 including me)

This is the grand-kids with Grandpa & Grandma. 

The last of the "cool" Movies 9 crew! (JK!) "cole" had her farewell today. She is going to make an awesome Missionary!
L-R: Lindsey, Nicole, me, Dallin. 

Mr. Dallin Fletcher Ford

      It seems every girl blog that I "blog stalk" follow has dedicated at least 1 post to their significant other (husband). I haven't done it nor really had the desire or inspiration to do so; 'til now. 

      He was born 11/09/86. He was named after Dallin H. Oaks. His middle name is his moms maiden name and he is the 2nd oldest of 4 boys. 

We first met each other at 

and then he went on his mission to 

Those are just some basic facts.

      Dallin and I are quite opposite on many spectrums: he is completely silly and goofy, he is good with kids, he can and prefers to drive a stick, he's not a big reader or music junky, he is a huge cat lover (I seriously think he considers himself to be the "cat whisperer"), he loves to figure out how tech-y stuff works, etc. He has quite a few little quirks about him that I LOVE that he absolutely has no control over: I love how not hairy he is (unlike the boys in my family *shudder*), his eye color (between both of our eye colors, I think our children are going to have gorgeous eyes!), he grew up not being a sports fan and I absolutely LOVE that! I HATE sports! He's never had a desire to join the military (which I don't think he could anyway with his asthma and allergies, even if he wanted to), he's not short and not freakishly tall, and he is a great cook! 

      Now to the point I'm finally getting to, he is also an extremely hard worker. This is a part of him that I don't think I appreciate enough. With the aspect that he is very silly, he hardly ever complains when I do the exact opposite. It takes a lot for things to get to him - unlike me. So, when he gets down, he gets down. It's probably one of the saddest things for me to see; for me to see him sad and depressed. He doesn't quit until he gets what he wants; when he's been jobless in the past, he didn't stop looking, except to sleep, until he found a job. It amazes me because I know I don't have that kind of determination. And if there is a specific job in mind he wants, he doesn't stop until he gets it - he doesn't "settle" like I do. Most of 2010, we were barely scrapping by. Dallin, I think, was working at JC Penny's and America First and/or Dominos. He was also going to school on top of all that, AND he donated plasma twice a week just so we could get an extra $200 a month. He did this for months. Just so we could attempt to pay rent and our bills. Most of that year, we were going to the bishops store house because we simply could not afford groceries. (We've actually hardly gone grocery shopping our whole marriage.) 

      Now, he's at a job we both hate, where it takes a physical toll on his body almost 12 hours a day, 5 days a week. He has no benefits and we hardly see each other during the week, because pretty much when he is not working, he is sleeping. He'd get another job, but, where will we find him another job that guarantees hours and pays $13 + an hour and can get over time? This is our current pickle - neither of us have a degree so, we can't exactly get a great job. Dallin got lucky with it when he did, but, he's done. He's the only LDS person there and he's tired of being around guys that swear profanities all day and are very derogatory towards women. Hopefully he won't have to work there much longer, but, we don't whats written in the stars for us. This is just one other reason why I'm grateful that now is not our time to bring children in the world; what a mess they'd be born into! Hopefully we both will soon be on a path that will lead to a happier place. 

Thank you, Hubby, for all that you do.